There’s a jewelery store here in Canada called Spence Diamonds, and they regularly purchase air time at my radio station of choice, 102.1 The Edge.
Now! Spence originally started pissing me off this past Christmas with ads that inferred if you didn’t lock your girl down with a ring, you were destined to end up lonely and alone. They weren’t even doing it in a “don’t you love her so much” way, they said it with “other guys are looking at her naked hand and smiling to themselves.” Never mind that I’m a bit sensitive about rings anyway, those kind of tactics are pretty uncool.
Recently, they’ve gone the other way. Spence Diamonds proprietor Sean Jones is coming up with the most ridiculously sappy garbage. Before I continue, I should add that they’ve also been doing something bizarre in the middle of their spots. Guitar riffs. Whenever Sean pauses in his sales pitch, some dude with two guitar lessons under his belt will wail something out for no reason. The end result is something like this:
Sean Jones: Some things in this world are mass-producible. But not love. It’s made from the twinkle of the January stars, the smell of fresh Strawberries and the laughter of children
Guitar: Byyyyyyyyyyeoooowww!
Sean Jones: That’s why each Spence Diamond is mined from the heart of Love mountain by a team of Teddy Bears and puppies, before being nestled in a bed of pure white dove feathers and carried by a pair of Cherubim to our showroom! Show her you’ll love her forever with an Eternity Necklace!
Guitar: Scccrreeeea!! Bwoop, bwoop! Screeeeeeeeeeaaa!
Sean Jones: And if you don’t buy it right now, Greg from accounting is going to sleep with her at the Team-building exercise in Ottawa next week. OBEY ME.
Guitar: Scribbidy-bippidy-boo!
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its true. I hate spence diamonds ads with a passion. I hate the way sean jones talks…if I ever see him in person I’m gonna bust an impression of him in his face, how he over pronouces like an excited bitch. And then slap him.
Ahahah this cracked me up. Thanks for brightening my day
At first when I kept hearing these Spence ads I had to change the station I was so annoyed with his voice! Now sadly I am so used to them..I listen to z103.5 where they play the ad like every 30 mins!!
Yes! I can’t stand the Spence diamond commericals. They keep getting worse and worse. I wish Sean Jones would go mute or fall off the face of the earth. Anything so I don’t have to listen to those friggin commericals anymore.
“…a team of Teddy Bears and puppies”
This was the part where I burst out laughing.
Even though I agree with everyone about how lame their ads are I thought Spence would be a good place to start looking with my boyfriend for our engagement ring. Well let me tell you it gets worse… we dealt with a girl named Michelle in their Vancouver store. What a little tramp … every chance she got she flashed her chest at my boyfriend and wouldn’t listen to a single thing I said .. then when we said we were probably not buying that day she instantly dropped us and started talking to other people. If you ever go to Spence in Vancouver … make sure you don’t deal with her at all costs
I couldn’t understand some parts of this article Spence Diamonds, What are you thinking?, but I guess I just need to check some more resources regarding this, because it sounds interesting.
Daniel, I think you have trouble understanding the article because you’re a spam bot. However, I approved your comment because it was refreshing to receive spam in a form that I can understand, instead of the filter-defeating gibberish. I did remove the link to the site you’re promoting, though.
SEAN JONES is such a DORKIE LOSER. every time commercials come on i LITEROTLY SCREAM!!!!!. ya… i know what you mean ‘Truth’… he sounds like an overly EXITED BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sean jones, if your reading this, listen to me… get a life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!… and some new vocals. im sorry… that was kinda harsh, but im just speaking what i think.
AKA HE ANNOYS ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Spence’s commercials are always on radio cos they fear to show their designs w/ images in public…
The designs not under copyright, such an illegal plagiarist~
quality sucks with impure golds
I know you all hate the ads, but let me tell you they work, look at all the people who are talking about Spence Diamonds. At least they know who Spence Diamonds is and what they do. Find something kind to say or don’t say anything at all.
Thank you for the comment, Lisa. You’re right - people do know about Spence Diamonds. However! People are *still* talking about my blog post, nearly two years later, yet Spence’s terrible ads are no longer running! The winner here is clearly myself and the terrible power I wield on the Internet.
Actually, I still hear Spence ads.. almost on a daily basis.
As lame as they are, it makes me want to go in and look around anyway.
Pretty good marketing gimmick imo.
No, no. Spence’s *terrible* ads are no longer running. The current ones are fine
He’s still running crappy ones here in Edmonton. Only now he has a female in them too. Damn I hate that guy.
I went to Spence Diamonds because of their ads however once we bought our ring our head ache started. Please know that the customer service in a particular store is down right poor. They not olny talked down to my fiance and I but they told us that our brand new ring error was our problem not theirs (managers word). We are now looking at atleast $100 in resizing because they measured the size wrong.
Hahahahahahahahahaha. There is nothing, I mean NOTHING worse than this commercial. I recently moved back to Calgary after a four year stint in Toronto, and thought I had at least escaped the “Spenths” diamonds “guy”. Unfortunately I was mistaken. As I was with the Rogers 5. I’m so happy that things are shiny.