Monthly Archives: January 2022

The Perfect Gift

When buying a present for your loved one, why not give the gift of ClearKase, the only clear case for your iPhone that WON’T turn yellow and reek of piss after a day. Hi, I’m Casey Kleercays, CEO of RealKase International.

My team and I have spent the last few months scouring the globe for manufacturing partners who’ve perfected lightweight, translucent cases that don’t carry with them the dread stench of human urine.

After a full day in your pocket, most clear phone cases will have soaked your pockets with the foul reek of an open sewer, causing pedestrians to exaggeratedly pinch their nose and fan the air as you pass in the street.

Owners of other clear cases are no doubt familiar with babies bursting into tears as they approach, or dogs frantically scratching the ground – base animal instinct overcoming thousands of years of domestication, reacting to what their primitive brains assume can only be a giant pit of human excreta, but which is in fact just the subpar translucent case rotting slowly in your pockets

Our competitors might be content to saddle you with a wretched boondoggle, a filthy technological albatross that shames you and your family, but let me be crystal clear (like our cases!) – our products will never cause the spirits your ancestors to shudder and moan with despair when you snap them on. Order now for delivery by December 24th!

ClearKases are not available in stores. Do not attempt to wash a ClearKase.